just breathe deeply and be patient

Maybe you have noticed the mysterious timer counting down in the left sidebar! Its true purpose is to build suspense. Note: ALL PARTIES WHO KNOW THE ANSWER TO THE SECRET ARE REMINDED THAT I completely forgot to TOTALLY MADE YOU SIGN NON-DISCLOSURE AGREEMENTS

Clues? Okay, sure. Here is a secret bonus comic that is somehow related to the big mystery! (It looks like I made it just now but I promise I didn’t.)