I feel compelled to explain a few things.

First of all, the alt-text of this comic is in reference to the way it seems as though every amazing, probably-untrue video game story I heard as a kid came from somebody’s cousin. Growing up I knew a couple of different people that made a habit of telling outlandish stories, and according to them, their cousins were the most amazing people ever.

The title of the comic is referring to my old pal Tim. Not you, Tim B, a different Tim. (I know a lot of Tims). Tim had secret knowledge and loved to fill me in on what he knew. I didn’t believe any of it, but his stories were entertaining and I wanted to know what he’d say next. At the tender age of eight he already “knew” all about sex (I wish I could remember this conversation), the occult, and best of all — video games!

On one instance, Tim told me all about how his brother fired up a game of Super Mario Bros. and for whatever reason was compelled to ram a 5-1/4″ floppy disk into the system along with the cartridge. Miraculously, rather than damaging anything, the game turned from 2D to 2.5D! Mario still ran from left to right but obstacles and enemies had astonishing depth and the game was immersive in a way it had never been before.

Of course, to their sadness they were never able to replicate their success. [February 22, 2012]